"Piraka with Chocolate" is an Epsiode of Amy Rose & the Looney Tunes
(Anyone can join in the episode)
Special Guest Voice Actor: ???? as Wolf #1, ???? as Wolf #2, ???? as Zotrahk, ???? as Koovan, ???? as Akar & ???? as Guurahk's Mother
(It was a beautiful day today & the Piraka are relaxing in their house)
Zaktan: Say, where's Vezok?
Reidak: He said something about checking the mail
[Vezok is humming inside of his mailbox. He checks his watch. The mailman opens the mailbox]
Vezok: Hi Mailman!
[The mailman yells in fear and runs off]
Vezok: O.K, see you tomorrow! (gets out of the mail box)
Zaktan, Reidak, Hakann, Avak & Thok: (goes to Vezok)
Avak: I see that the mail's here.
Thok: So, what did we get?
Vezok: Let's see... [Looks through the mail] Reidak, Hakann, Me, Zaktan, Avak, Thok, Hey! A magazine! [looks at the magazine] That's funny, I don't remember subscribing to Fancy Living Digest.
Piraka: [They look inside the magazine] WHOOOOOOOOOAAAAH!!
Zaktan: Look at all these glossy depictions of a higher standard of living!
[A picture of a rich person's swimming pool is shown]
Hakann: This guy's so rich, he has a swimming pool in his swimming pool!
[A picture is shown of an old, rich person surrounded with bags of money]
Avak: [Points at the man's feet] This guy's got shoes!
Vezon: Hey! Give me that! [Takes the magazine] Stealing my mail, huh? You're lucky I don't report you all to the authorities!
Zaktan: Hey Vezon, how do the people in that magazine get all that money?
Vezon: That's easy, you idiot. They're entrepreneurs. They sell things to people.
Reidak: What kind of things?
Vezon: How should I know? Things people wanna buy! [walks off] Now keep your paws off my mail or else your gonna get it big time.
Vezok: Sheesh, Vezon's a grouch.
Zaktan: That's it, Piraka! We gotta becomes entrepreneurs!
Avak: Is that gonna hurt?
Thok: (sighs) I don't think so
Zaktan: Quick Piraka, without thinking, if you could have anything in the world right now, what would it be?
Vezok: Uh... [sweats] More time for thinking.
Zaktan: No, something real, an item, something you would pay for.
Hakann: Cheese burger?
Zaktan: What? A cheese burger?
Hakann: What? I'm starving for something to eat
Reidak: Like eating a chocolate bar?
Zaktan: That's a great idea, Reidak! We'll become traveling chocolate bar salesmen
[The scene changes to Zaktan, Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok exiting a Shopping Store carrying many chocolate bars]
Avak: Fancy living, here we come!
Vezok: Make way for a couple of entrepreneurs! [He pronounces it "ontre-prenyouers"]
Hakann: I believe you prenouned it wrong.
[The 6 Piraka walk up to a house]
Zaktan: O.K. gang, this is it! The first step on our road to living fancy! Just follow my lead.
Reidak: Got it.
Thok: Alright then. Here goes.
Zaktan: (knocks on the door)
Two Wolves walk out
Zaktan: Good afternoon, could we interest you two in some [holds up chocolate bar] chocolate?
Wolf 1: Did you just say Chocolate?
Reidak: Yes sir (holds up 2 chocolate bars, one with nuts & the other one without nuts) With or without nuts?
Wolf 2: Chocolate
Wolf 1: Chocolate!
Both: CHOCOLATE, CHOCOLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE
Zaktan, Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (walking backwards slowly)
Avak: On second thought we better go.
Vezok: (quickly) See ya later, bye!
Zaktan, Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (runs off, carrying the chocolate bars with them)
the wolves chase them
[The scene cuts to the Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Zaktan, Avak & Thok at another house with Zaktan ringing the doorbell]
Zaktan: Ok ok, the first 2 wolves didn't count. This is our REAL first step!
Zotrahk:(Scam Makuta) Why Hello there
Vezok: (notices Zotrahk) Who's that?
Hakann: I'm not sure, but he might be wanting to buy some chocolate.
Avak: Let's find out.
Zaktan, Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (goes up to Zotrahk & the Makuta)
Zaktan: Good morning sir, would you like to buy some chocolate?
Zotrahk:(Chocolate bars, eh?
Thok: Yes sir, we are traveling chocolate bar salesman.
Zortrahk (chuckles) A couple of mediocre salesmen if you ask me. That's no way to carry your merchandise.
(scene shows Vezok on his hands & feet, like an animal, with a bunch of chocolate bars stuffed on his spine)
Vezok: It's not?
Zortrahk: No, no, no, wrong. You boys want to be good salesmen, right?
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: Oh, most certainely sir.
Zaktan: (thinking very cautiously) Hmm...
Zortahk: Well, [chuckles] no self respecting candy bar salesman would be caught dead without one of these! [He holds up a bright-orange bag]
Avak: Wooooooow.... what is it?
Zortahk: It's a candy bar bag, you knuckle-head! It's specially designed to cradle each candy bar in velvet-lined comfort!
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (are amazed by the candy bar bag)
Hakann: (about to touch the candy bar bag)
Zortahk: [pulls bag away] BUT, I'm wasting my time. [Walks inside] You don't need these bags.
Zaktan: Exactly, right gang?
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: We need them! We need them!
Zaktan: (groans as he facepalms)
Zortahk: So long, boys! Happy hunting!
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (leaves with Zaktan while holding armful of candy bar bags)
Zortahk: [Laughs when they aren't looking] Suckers... [walks back inside]
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (singing) Fancy living, here we come! La, la, la la, la!
Zaktan: WOULD YOU SHUT UP ALREADY?!
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (stopped in shock & disbelief)
Avak: What's the matter, Zaktan?
Zaktan: I'm sorry for that outburst, but I don't trust that Rahkshi for any second.
Reidak: Sheesh, he's trying to help us being better chocolate bar salesmen.
Zaktan: Hmmm, I don't know...
Vezok: Prehaps, you'll feel better once we try next door, ok?
Zaktan: (sighs) Fine, let's try next door.
(The Piraka goes next door)
Thok: Uh? Zaktan, can you ring the door bell for us? Our hands are full.
Zaktan: Ok, ok. (rings the doorbell)
Zaktan: What the?! Say, weren't you the same guy who sold us these candy bar bags?
Zortahk: I don't recall, but it looks like you have a lot of bags there
Hakann: Indeed we do. Loads of them!
Zortahk: You two lady killers are too smart to be without one of my patented Candy Bar Bag Carrying Bags. [Holds up two large maroon bags]
Zaktan: Actually there are 6 of us & no way! We're not falling for that trick again! Right gang?
Reidak: We'll take 20.
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Zaktan, Avak & Thok: (we're carrying 6 maroon bags, 1 each)
Zaktan: Now no more bags!
Zaktan: (knocks on the door)
Zaktan: We're selling chocolate bars, would you like to buy one?
Blaze: Why that sounds nice, I'll take one
Zaktan: 1 Chocolate Bar, coming up.
(The Piraka begins to unzip the candy bar bag carrying bags & proceeds to unzip one of the candy bar bags)
Zaktan, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: (continues unzipping, keeps finding candy bar bags inside each candy bar bag & begins to unzip the bags in a super fast)
Reidak: (looking through his candy bar bag carrying bag, humming)
Blaze: I dont have time for this (Closes her door)
Thok: Not a single one.
Zaktan: I got nothing here.
Reidak: (grabs a chocolate bar from his Candy bar bag carrying bag) I got it!
Zaktan: You have the chocolate bar this entire time?!
Reidak: Actually, my candy bar bag carrying bag is loaded with every single chocolate we have. You must've found out that your big bags are filled with little bags.
Hakann: Why didn't you say something before?
Reidak: I was in the moment.
Vezok: (groans as he facepalms)
Reidak: Oh well. At least we got one chocolate for Blaze the...
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Zaktan, Avak & Thok: (starts running away, carrying the Candy Bar Bag Carrying Bags filled with chocolate bars)
[The scene cuts to the 6 Piraka sitting in a diner]
Zaktan: We're not doing so well, gang. We need a new approach, a new tactic. But what could it be?
Vezok: Hm... I got it! Let's get naked!
Hakann: No way!
Zaktan: Hakann's right.
Avak: No, let's save that for when we're selling real estate...
Zaktan: There must be SOMETHING. What was the reason we bought those bags?
Reidak: Zotrahk said that were mediocre...
Zaktan: That's it! He made us feel special!
Avak: Yeah, he did... I'm going back to buy more bags!
[Avak runs to the door]
Zaktan: NO, wait Avak!
[Avak freezes in place]
Zaktan: What's the deal with you 5 & those bags?
Vezok: I don't know, we like to buy bags.
Thok: Zaktan, I have the solution. Why don't we try being nice?
Vezok: Oh, okay.
Hakann: How do we do that?
[Scene changes to the 6 Piraka walking up to a door]
Zaktan: Remember gang, flatter the customer. Make him or her feel good. Got it?
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Avak & Thok: Got it.
Zaktan: Ok, who's first?
Reidak: I like to go first.
Avak: Alright Reidak, give it a shot.
[Reidak knocks on the door]
Koovan the Rahkshi of Knowledge: Ya
Reidak: I love you.
[A harp is heard playing]
Koovan:(Slams the Door)
(A tuba is heard, after the slamming)
Avak: Yeah, I think you laid him about a teensy bit thick there.
Zaktan: (sighs) Anyone else want a try?
Thok: Gang, let me try.
Zaktan: Alright, break a leg.
Thok: (rings the doorbell)
Koovan: Please Go away
Thok: (clears his throat) How are you doing?
Koovan: How am I doing?
Thok: Wanna buy some chocolate?
Vezok: (excited) WE GOT HIM NOW!
Koovan: Sorry but Chocolate is sugar and sugar turns to bubbly fat *At Avak* Isn't that right tubby?
Avak: (his stomach is bubbling) (chuckles) It tickles.
Koovan: As you can see me and chocolate no longer hang (Shows a picture of him as an over weight Krata)
Zaktan: Oh, I see your point.
Koovan: You boys can keep that, for $10
Vezok: (holds up some cash) We'll take 5!
Zaktan: I said "No"!
Reidak, Hakann, Vezok, Zaktan, Avak & Thok: (walking down on the path)
Zaktan: Guys, we haven't sold one chocolate bar. I get the feeling we're too easily distracted.
Vezok: (staring at Koovan's overweight Kraata pictures) Huh?
Hakann: I say we make pact right now that we will stay focused on selling at the next house.
Vezok: [Removing pictures from his face] Huh?
Reidak: [Holding out his hand] Let's just shake on it.
Vezok: [Looking at the other 5 Piraka, looking confused] Did you say something?
[Cut to the other customer's house, the 6 Piraka are seen entering the view]
Thok: Remember gang, focus.
Avak: Yeah, what he said. (knocks on the door)
Zaktan: Good afternoon sir. We're selling chocolate bars.
[Hypnotic music plays as Vezok somehow moves up to Akar with his face going in and out back and forth]
Akar: Why is Tall and Creepy staring at me?
[Cut to Vezok's P.O.V.]
[Cut to the inside of the Akar's house in normal P.O.V.]
Akar: BACK OFF FREAK (Slams the door on Vezok's eyes)
Vezok: OW! (looks around the inside of Akar's house) Nice place you got here.|
Zaktan: I can't understand what were doing wrong.
Avak: I can't understand anything
Zaktan: There's something to this selling game were just not getting. Other people do it, I mean look at that! (points to a billboard sign)
(Cut to Sign)
(The Sign says: Try salty Krata chips. They're delicious!!!!)
Reidak: [reading the sign] Try Salty Kraata Chips. They're delicious.
[Cut to the 6 Piraka]
Zaktan: They are most certainly not delicious!
Vezok: [smiling] Not the way I use them!
[Cut to Zaktan & Thok]
Zaktan: Yet they sell millions of bags a day!
Thok: How are they doing this exactly?
[Cut to Hakann]
Hakann: Well, maybe if they didn't stretch the truth, they wouldn't sell as many.
[Cut to the 6 Piraka]
Zaktan: [Happily] That's it, Hakann! You're a genius! We've gotta stretch the truth!
Avak: You gotta be kidding me!
6 Piraka: (makes their getaway)
(The 6 Piraka arrived at yet another house.)
Zaktan: We'll work as a team. Let me get this customer warmed up and you come in for the kill!
Vezok: The kill!
Zaktan: And I don't mean literally.
Zaktan: (rings the doorbell)
[Camera Cut to the 6 Piraka]
Zaktan: Hello, young lady.
[Zaktan winks at the rest of the Piraka, Avak then chuckles]
Zaktan: We're selling chocolate. [Getting a closer look at Guurahk] Is your mother home?
(Camera cut to Guurahk)
(A very aged kraata rolls in on a Borahk)
[Camera cut to the 6 Piraka, who have stunned looks on their faces. Camera cut back to Guurahk's mother]
Guurahks mom: YOU JUST CAN'T WAIT FOR ME TO DIE CAN YOU
(Camera cut to the Piraka looking each other)
Guuarhk: THEY'RE SELLING CHOCOLATE
Guurahks mom: They're selling chocolate?
(Camera cut back to Guurahk & her mother)
Guurahks mom: WHAT WHAT ARE THEY SELLING?
Guurahks mom: WHAT
Guurahk: THEY'RE SELLING CHOCOLATE
Guurahks mom: THEY'RE SELLING CHOCOLATE?
Guurahks mom: oh chocolate, I remember when they first invented chocolate, sweet sweet chocolate, I ALWAYS HATED IT!!!!
(Camera cut to Zaktan sweating)
Zaktan: (sweating nervously) Actually, this chocolate is not for eating. It's for... uh...
Reidak: You rub it on your skin and it makes you live forever.
(Camera cut to Guurahk & her mother)
Guurahk: Oh no
Guurahks mom: (Over all of Guurahk's no's) Ist that so I'll take one
Guurahk:(Growls and pays)
Guurahk's Mom: Hurry up Guurahk, start rubbing me with that choclate
Guurahk:(Glares at The Piraka) I hate you (slams the door close)
(Camera cut to the Piraka)
Thok: Well what do you know, it worked.
Hakann: It did, didn't it?
Zaktan: (to the rest of the Piraka) If we keep exaggerating the truth, we'll be fancy living in no time!
Vezok: [Raising fist] Hooray for lying!
Avak: Let's get to it.
(Camera cut to the Piraka who are with another customer)
Zaktan: It'll make your hair grow.
Turahk: Sweet my wifes trying to grow a beard
(Camera cut to tbe Piraka again with a different customer)
Hakann: It'll make you sound smart.
(Camera cut to Vezok)
Vezok: It'll keep your face from getting any uglier.
Recolored Vezok: What a relief
[Camera cut to Avak]
Avak: They'll make you fly!
[Camera cut to Reidak]
Reidak: You'll fall in love!
[Camera cut to Thok]
Thok: They'll bring world peace!
[Camera cut to Vezok]
Vezok: You'll walk through walls!
[Camera cut to Zaktan]
Zaktan: [ecoing] You'll rule the world!!
[Camera cut to the 6 Piraka, bandaged up, ringing the doorbell]
6 Piraka: (bandaged up & wrapped in casts, muffled chuckling)
Reidak: This'll be the best lie yet!
Zaktan: I know, this guy will feel so sorry for us, he'll have to buy all of our chocolate!
A bandaged Rahkshi opens the door
Rahkshi: Yes how can I help you two out
Zaktan: Hello, sir. Would you like to buy a chocolate bar? We need an operation.
Rahkshi: (Walks out, he looks far worse them them) Whats aling you?
Zaktan: [nervously] Um, we've got some head trauma and internal bleeding?
Rahkshi: Some people have all the leg, I was born with Glass bones and Paper Skin, every morning I break my legs and every night my arms, When I go to bed and my constant heart attacks put me to sleep I (Looses Balance) Oh no no (Falls the sound of breaking glass is heard on impact, he groans in pain)
Zaktan: Come on guys. It's time to drop the act & let's help him!
Thok: I believe this is sound very serious. Alright, we'll do it.
[Cut to the inside of the Rahkshi's house. The 6 Piraka enter from the left, carrying the Rahkshi with Zaktan & Thok carrying his legs, Hakann & Avak carrying his lower body & Reidak & Vezok carrying his upper body.]
Zaktan: Careful, careful. Now put him down gently.
[Reidak & Vezok drops the Rahkshi's upper body, a glass breaking sound is heard, cut close to the customer]
Rahkshi: (Groans in pain)
Hakann: (to Reidak & Vezok, angrily) Dude, we said "Put him down gently"!
Reidak & Vezok: (shrugs) What?
Zaktan: Poor, poor man. Is there anything, anything we can do to help you?
Rahkshi: well as you can see my medical bills are really high, I have no choice but to sell, Chocolate bars
(The 6 Piraka notices a massive stack of crates filled with chocolate bars.)
(We can see the 6 Piraka are outside, carrying lots of crates filled with chocolate bars as the Rahkshi watches them from the window.)
Rahkshi: such good boys, it does be me good to know (Unzips himself to show he is Zotrahk ) That I conned such a group of suckaroo's (LAUGHS EVILY)
(With the Piraka down the street)
Zaktan: (grunting) Dontt get me wrong here, guys. Itss great helping that guy out, but theress a problem.
Hakann: Oh, and what is that?
Zaktan: The problem is that there's no one left in town to chocolate bars too. (trips & falls) Whoa whoa whoa!
Zaktan: (has his crate flat on his chest & stomach) Letss just face the facts, guys. Weree failures.
Thok: We cantt give up now.
Vezok: Don't worry I can live with that. (Places his crate on top of Zaktan's crate & sits on it)
Reidak: Me too. (Places the crate down next to them & sits down)
Avak: Now what are we gonna do? Were lousy business men.
Zaktan: Letss just change our group name to the "Why Bother Club".
the two wolves appear
(The yells from the two wolves have knocked over the 6 Piraka & the crates.)
(Camera cuts to the Piraka, babbling while feeling scared.)
The Piraka: (babbling in their own different words of begging & pleading for mercy)
Wolf One: FINALLY WE'VE BEEN TRYING TO CATCH YOU ALL DAY
Wolf Two: AND NOW WE'VE GOTTCHA RIGHT WHERE WE WANT YOU
Wolves:(Holds up two suitcases of cash) We'd like to buy all your chocolate
(The 6 Piraka's jaws Litterally drop to the ground in shock & disbelief, not before they begin to fell apart into pieces, leaving all 6 heads on top of the pile.)
Zaktan: (still in shock & dis-belief) Thank you for your patronage.
(The 6 Piraka are now seen, back together, carrying 5 wagons of cash.)
Reidak: Are we living in the fancy life yet Zaktan?
Zaktan: (emerges from one of the wagon filled with cash) Not yet my brothers. We gotta spent all of the money first.
Vezok: But what are we gonna spent it on?
Avak: Yeah, where do we start?
Zaktan: (starts thinking) Hmm...
(At a fancy restaurant)
Vezon: (enters inside, wearing a tuxedo, a monocle & a top hat, holding his Spear of Fusion & a cane) (to Vorahk) Good evening. Table for one please?
Vorrahk: Sorry but the Entire Restaurant has been rented out.
Vezok: What?! But it's my only night to be fancy! Who could've afford to rent out the entire restaurant?
Vorrahk: Oh just a couple of Rich entrepreneurs and their dates.
(We can the 6 Piraka are at their table with 6 of their girlfriends. Among the 2 out of 6 are actuall Guurahk & her mother.)
Zaktan: Sooo uh... How long have you ladies known each other?
Guurahks mom: WHAT, THAT IS HE SAYING
"That's All Folks"